How to be Assertive and Loving Too

Do you pay attention to what other people want and forget about your own needs? Do you keep quiet about your opinions so you won't upset others? Has it been months (or years) since you've stood up for yourself in an argument? If so, you may be taking a passive role in your relationships.

On the other hand, do you take care of yourself first and foremost because you're pretty sure no one else will? Do people avoid spending time with you, and seem reluctant to tell you why? Do you wish other people would show some backbone and stand up for themselves, but find it irritating when they do? If so, you may have been trained to take an aggressive role in relationships.

Being nice is not the same as being a doormat. You can be helpful and caring without getting run over by someone else's aggressiveness. This four-week workshop teaches you how to give without being taken and how to be assertive without being obnoxious.

Neither a passive approach nor an aggressive approach works well, because there's always somebody who wins and somebody who loses. Most of us have seen very few examples of truly assertive behavior, and so we don't know how to stop being passive or aggressive. This workshop helps you learn how to act in a new, more effective, more loving way.

"I just wanted to drop you a line and tell you that the assertiveness training and the ideal relationship workshop both gave me the skills and the intentionality to develop what I have desired, a super relationship. So thank you for sharing your skills with me, the classes were well worth it and life changing." -- Liz Sifuentes (from Austin, Texas)

When you attend, you'll receive a 30-page workbook to use during the class. During the first evening, we take a look at passive, aggressive and assertive behavior, and learn how to tell the difference between them. In each of the four evenings, you'll get a chance to practice what you've learned, starting with some very simple "canned" role plays, and working up to some role plays from your or others' real lives.

You'll have a chance to have an in-depth discussion of twelve Assertive Rights, so that you won't feel as guilty when you act assertively in the future.And you'll get to practice acting assertively in a safe, supportive group, so that when you encounter a situation in real life where you need to act assertively, you'll be able to draw on the skills you've built in class.

Class size is limited to 12 people, so you'll have a chance to explore in-depth the questions and issues that are most interesting and important to you. I hope you can attend and learn how to improve your relationships, increase your sense of empowerment, and start enjoying your interactions with others more.

Background and Training

Robert McGarey, M.A., has more than twenty years of experience in presenting workshops for personal and professional development. He has been a featured speaker at numerous local and national conferences. He has extensive experience and training in a variety of psychological techniques that promote physical, emotional, and spiritual wellness.

Both of Bob's parents are holistic M.D.'s, and have been pioneers in the field for almost forty years. They have authored dozens of books and articles on holistic medicine, and are nationally and internationally in demand as speakers on the subject. Growing up in this atmosphere, he developed a deep appreciation for the importance of nurturing the whole person -- mind, body and spirit.

Bob received an accredited Master of Arts degree in Humanistic and Transpersonal Psychology from Johnston College in 1978. In 1986 he founded The Human Potential Center (a 501(c)(3) nonprofit educational organization), and has served as its Director since that time.

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This page was last revised on September 04, 2007
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